the mourning chat
COMING SOON
In a dimly lit room, Emma sits hunched over her laptop, a half-empty glass of red wine beside her. Surrounded by scattered tissues and looking through photos of her boyfriend, James, her eyes are red and puffy from crying, her heart heavy with grief. The smell of 'feu du bois' from French candles fills the room, the one luxury James never begrudged her from buying. Emily catches sight of Milo, the ginger poodle, gifted to her by James two years prior. As she gazes into Milo's big, cartoon-like eyes, a flicker of hope lights up within her for a brief moment. Always a faithful companion and constant source of comfort, she needed Milo now more than ever. How will she find the strength to endure the days ahead, let alone the months and years to come? Emily's phone pings. Instinctively, she reaches for it, still half-expecting to see James's name followed by the love hearts and diamond ring emojis she had assigned to him. Instead, it's Paul, a long-time friend who introduced Emily and James five years ago. Since losing James just two weeks ago, Emily had been surrounded by an outpouring of love and support from friends. Her mother had also been supportive, but their relationship was complex, and Emily often found herself keeping her mother at arm's length when it came to emotional matters."How are you today? Have you managed to get some food into you?" Paul's message reads. Emily glances at her glass of wine and snaps a quick photo, replying, "No, but don't worry, I'm staying hydrated."Emily shuts her laptop, pulls the blanket that has draped her shoulders off the couch, and in a low monotone voice calls to Milo, "Come on, Milo,". oblivious to the loss he has also endured, Milo enthusiastically follows her to the bedroom. A room that once served as a sanctuary of love, intimacy, and comfort now feels cold, empty, and dark. A room that once held the conversations of their shared dreams now lay silent, the remnants of their aspirations reduced to mere fractions of dust. A room that she will remain in for the following days, riding the waves of her pain and navigating the turbulent currents of her grief. Joanne's life took a significant turn when she married Emma's father at the age of 20. Richard, a seasoned art collector, was a decade her senior and had accumulated considerable wealth through savvy investments over the years. The arrival of Emma, born when Joanne was 23, added another layer of complexity to their marriage with Joanne feeling pressured into having children for Richard, despite her reservations and disinterest in motherhood. This lack of enthusiasm became apparent to Emma as a child, as she grappled with the emotional distance her mother put between them. Matt was away travelling again for work, a routine that Emma was adjusting to through their sporadic phone calls spanning across different time zones. Her morning had been slow, tidying up and arranging another bouquet Matt had sent her into a vintage vase she had found at a Paris flea market. With no concrete plans for the rest of the weekend, besides wanting to try out a new recipe she saw in the latest New York Times cooking newsletter, Emma decided to reach out to Paul and see if he wanted to do something. She was missing him and was feeling unsettled and confused by the distance that was growing between them. Emma's phone rang, and as she glanced at the screen to see her mother's name flashing, Emma felt it was a good time to take the call. With Matt being in town consistently for the past month, she had not been great at keeping in contact with her. Matt is a man of many facets, his passion for technology is matched only by his insatiable curiosity about the world. His frequent travels are not just a means of exploring new destinations but also an integral part of his professional life. While Emma admires his adventurous spirit, she finds herself at times perplexed by the enigmatic nature of his work. Emma's brows creased slightly in surprise. "Oh," she replied. Despite a connection developing, there were still many aspects of James's life that remained a mystery to her. She knew he worked in the tech industry with Paul and harbored a peculiar fascination with Elon Musk, but the specifics of his job had always eluded her. Although he mentioned a bit about it on their first date, she couldn't recall the exact details.In a dimly lit room, Emma sits hunched over her laptop, a half-empty glass of red wine beside her. Surrounded by scattered tissues and looking through photos of her boyfriend, James, her eyes are red and puffy from crying, her heart heavy with grief. The smell of 'feu du bois' from French candles fills the room, the one luxury James never begrudged her from buying. Emily catches sight of Milo, the ginger poodle, gifted to her by James two years prior. As she gazes into Milo's big, cartoon-like eyes, a flicker of hope lights up within her for a brief moment. Always a faithful companion and constant source of comfort, she needed Milo now more than ever. How will she find the strength to endure the days ahead, let alone the months and years to come? Emily's phone pings. Instinctively, she reaches for it, still half-expecting to see James's name followed by the love hearts and diamond ring emojis she had assigned to him. Instead, it's Paul, a long-time friend who introduced Emily and James five years ago. Since losing James just two weeks ago, Emily had been surrounded by an outpouring of love and support from friends. Her mother had also been supportive, but their relationship was complex, and Emily often found herself keeping her mother at arm's length when it came to emotional matters."How are you today? Have you managed to get some food into you?" Paul's message reads. Emily glances at her glass of wine and snaps a quick photo, replying, "No, but don't worry, I'm staying hydrated."Emily shuts her laptop, pulls the blanket that has draped her shoulders off the couch, and in a low monotone voice calls to Milo, "Come on, Milo,". oblivious to the loss he has also endured, Milo enthusiastically follows her to the bedroom. A room that once served as a sanctuary of love, intimacy, and comfort now feels cold, empty, and dark. A room that once held the conversations of their shared dreams now lay silent, the remnants of their aspirations reduced to mere fractions of dust. A room that she will remain in for the following days, riding the waves of her pain and navigating the turbulent currents of her grief. Joanne's life took a significant turn when she married Emma's father at the age of 20. Richard, a seasoned art collector, was a decade her senior and had accumulated considerable wealth through savvy investments over the years. The arrival of Emma, born when Joanne was 23, added another layer of complexity to their marriage with Joanne feeling pressured into having children for Richard, despite her reservations and disinterest in motherhood. This lack of enthusiasm became apparent to Emma as a child, as she grappled with the emotional distance her mother put between them. Matt was away travelling again for work, a routine that Emma was adjusting to through their sporadic phone calls spanning across different time zones. Her morning had been slow, tidying up and arranging another bouquet Matt had sent her into a vintage vase she had found at a Paris flea market. With no concrete plans for the rest of the weekend, besides wanting to try out a new recipe she saw in the latest New York Times cooking newsletter, Emma decided to reach out to Paul and see if he wanted to do something. She was missing him and was feeling unsettled and confused by the distance that was growing between them. Emma's phone rang, and as she glanced at the screen to see her mother's name flashing, Emma felt it was a good time to take the call. With Matt being in town consistently for the past month, she had not been great at keeping in contact with her. Matt is a man of many facets, his passion for technology is matched only by his insatiable curiosity about the world. His frequent travels are not just a means of exploring new destinations but also an integral part of his professional life. While Emma admires his adventurous spirit, she finds herself at times perplexed by the enigmatic nature of his work. Emma's brows creased slightly in surprise. "Oh," she replied. Despite a connection developing, there were still many aspects of James's life that remained a mystery to her. She knew he worked in the tech industry with Paul and harbored a peculiar fascination with Elon Musk, but the specifics of his job had always eluded her. Although he mentioned a bit about it on their first date, she couldn't recall the exact details.In a dimly lit room, Emma sits hunched over her laptop, a half-empty glass of red wine beside her. Surrounded by scattered tissues and looking through photos of her boyfriend, James, her eyes are red and puffy from crying, her heart heavy with grief. The smell of 'feu du bois' from French candles fills the room, the one luxury James never begrudged her from buying. Emily catches sight of Milo, the ginger poodle, gifted to her by James two years prior. As she gazes into Milo's big, cartoon-like eyes, a flicker of hope lights up within her for a brief moment. Always a faithful companion and constant source of comfort, she needed Milo now more than ever. How will she find the strength to endure the days ahead, let alone the months and years to come? Emily's phone pings. Instinctively, she reaches for it, still half-expecting to see James's name followed by the love hearts and diamond ring emojis she had assigned to him. Instead, it's Paul, a long-time friend who introduced Emily and James five years ago. Since losing James just two weeks ago, Emily had been surrounded by an outpouring of love and support from friends. Her mother had also been supportive, but their relationship was complex, and Emily often found herself keeping her mother at arm's length when it came to emotional matters."How are you today? Have you managed to get some food into you?" Paul's message reads. Emily glances at her glass of wine and snaps a quick photo, replying, "No, but don't worry, I'm staying hydrated."Emily shuts her laptop, pulls the blanket that has draped her shoulders off the couch, and in a low monotone voice calls to Milo, "Come on, Milo,". oblivious to the loss he has also endured, Milo enthusiastically follows her to the bedroom. A room that once served as a sanctuary of love, intimacy, and comfort now feels cold, empty, and dark. A room that once held the conversations of their shared dreams now lay silent, the remnants of their aspirations reduced to mere fractions of dust. A room that she will remain in for the following days, riding the waves of her pain and navigating the turbulent currents of her grief. Joanne's life took a significant turn when she married Emma's father at the age of 20. Richard, a seasoned art collector, was a decade her senior and had accumulated considerable wealth through savvy investments over the years. The arrival of Emma, born when Joanne was 23, added another layer of complexity to their marriage with Joanne feeling pressured into having children for Richard, despite her reservations and disinterest in motherhood. This lack of enthusiasm became apparent to Emma as a child, as she grappled with the emotional distance her mother put between them. Matt was away travelling again for work, a routine that Emma was adjusting to through their sporadic phone calls spanning across different time zones. Her morning had been slow, tidying up and arranging another bouquet Matt had sent her into a vintage vase she had found at a Paris flea market. With no concrete plans for the rest of the weekend, besides wanting to try out a new recipe she saw in the latest New York Times cooking newsletter, Emma decided to reach out to Paul and see if he wanted to do something. She was missing him and was feeling unsettled and confused by the distance that was growing between them. Emma's phone rang, and as she glanced at the screen to see her mother's name flashing, Emma felt it was a good time to take the call. With Matt being in town consistently for the past month, she had not been great at keeping in contact with her. Matt is a man of many facets, his passion for technology is matched only by his insatiable curiosity about the world. His frequent travels are not just a means of exploring new destinations but also an integral part of his professional life. While Emma admires his adventurous spirit, she finds herself at times perplexed by the enigmatic nature of his work. Emma's brows creased slightly in surprise. "Oh," she replied. Despite a connection developing, there were still many aspects of James's life that remained a mystery to her. She knew he worked in the tech industry with Paul and harbored a peculiar fascination with Elon Musk, but the specifics of his job had always eluded her. Although he mentioned a bit about it on their first date, she couldn't recall the exact details.In a dimly lit room, Emma sits hunched over her laptop, a half-empty glass of red wine beside her. Surrounded by scattered tissues and looking through photos of her boyfriend, James, her eyes are red and puffy from crying, her heart heavy with grief. The smell of 'feu du bois' from French candles fills the room, the one luxury James never begrudged her from buying. Emily catches sight of Milo, the ginger poodle, gifted to her by James two years prior. As she gazes into Milo's big, cartoon-like eyes, a flicker of hope lights up within her for a brief moment. Always a faithful companion and constant source of comfort, she needed Milo now more than ever. How will she find the strength to endure the days ahead, let alone the months and years to come? Emily's phone pings. Instinctively, she reaches for it, still half-expecting to see James's name followed by the love hearts and diamond ring emojis she had assigned to him. Instead, it's Paul, a long-time friend who introduced Emily and James five years ago. Since losing James just two weeks ago, Emily had been surrounded by an outpouring of love and support from friends. Her mother had also been supportive, but their relationship was complex, and Emily often found herself keeping her mother at arm's length when it came to emotional matters."How are you today? Have you managed to get some food into you?" Paul's message reads. Emily glances at her glass of wine and snaps a quick photo, replying, "No, but don't worry, I'm staying hydrated."Emily shuts her laptop, pulls the blanket that has draped her shoulders off the couch, and in a low monotone voice calls to Milo, "Come on, Milo,". oblivious to the loss he has also endured, Milo enthusiastically follows her to the bedroom. A room that once served as a sanctuary of love, intimacy, and comfort now feels cold, empty, and dark. A room that once held the conversations of their shared dreams now lay silent, the remnants of their aspirations reduced to mere fractions of dust. A room that she will remain in for the following days, riding the waves of her pain and navigating the turbulent currents of her grief. Joanne's life took a significant turn when she married Emma's father at the age of 20. Richard, a seasoned art collector, was a decade her senior and had accumulated considerable wealth through savvy investments over the years. The arrival of Emma, born when Joanne was 23, added another layer of complexity to their marriage with Joanne feeling pressured into having children for Richard, despite her reservations and disinterest in motherhood. This lack of enthusiasm became apparent to Emma as a child, as she grappled with the emotional distance her mother put between them. Matt was away travelling again for work, a routine that Emma was adjusting to through their sporadic phone calls spanning across different time zones. Her morning had been slow, tidying up and arranging another bouquet Matt had sent her into a vintage vase she had found at a Paris flea market. With no concrete plans for the rest of the weekend, besides wanting to try out a new recipe she saw in the latest New York Times cooking newsletter, Emma decided to reach out to Paul and see if he wanted to do something. She was missing him and was feeling unsettled and confused by the distance that was growing between them. Emma's phone rang, and as she glanced at the screen to see her mother's name flashing, Emma felt it was a good time to take the call. With Matt being in town consistently for the past month, she had not been great at keeping in contact with her. Matt is a man of many facets, his passion for technology is matched only by his insatiable curiosity about the world. His frequent travels are not just a means of exploring new destinations but also an integral part of his professional life. While Emma admires his adventurous spirit, she finds herself at times perplexed by the enigmatic nature of his work. Emma's brows creased slightly in surprise. "Oh," she replied. Despite a connection developing, there were still many aspects of James's life that remained a mystery to her. She knew he worked in the tech industry with Paul and harbored a peculiar fascination with Elon Musk, but the specifics of his job had always eluded her. Although he mentioned a bit about it on their first date, she couldn't recall the exact details.In a dimly lit room, Emma sits hunched over her laptop, a half-empty glass of red wine beside her. Surrounded by scattered tissues and looking through photos of her boyfriend, James, her eyes are red and puffy from crying, her heart heavy with grief. The smell of 'feu du bois' from French candles fills the room, the one luxury James never begrudged her from buying. Emily catches sight of Milo, the ginger poodle, gifted to her by James two years prior. As she gazes into Milo's big, cartoon-like eyes, a flicker of hope lights up within her for a brief moment. Always a faithful companion and constant source of comfort, she needed Milo now more than ever. How will she find the strength to endure the days ahead, let alone the months and years to come? Emily's phone pings. Instinctively, she reaches for it, still half-expecting to see James's name followed by the love hearts and diamond ring emojis she had assigned to him. Instead, it's Paul, a long-time friend who introduced Emily and James five years ago. Since losing James just two weeks ago, Emily had been surrounded by an outpouring of love and support from friends. Her mother had also been supportive, but their relationship was complex, and Emily often found herself keeping her mother at arm's length when it came to emotional matters."How are you today? Have you managed to get some food into you?" Paul's message reads. Emily glances at her glass of wine and snaps a quick photo, replying, "No, but don't worry, I'm staying hydrated."Emily shuts her laptop, pulls the blanket that has draped her shoulders off the couch, and in a low monotone voice calls to Milo, "Come on, Milo,". oblivious to the loss he has also endured, Milo enthusiastically follows her to the bedroom. A room that once served as a sanctuary of love, intimacy, and comfort now feels cold, empty, and dark. A room that once held the conversations of their shared dreams now lay silent, the remnants of their aspirations reduced to mere fractions of dust. A room that she will remain in for the following days, riding the waves of her pain and navigating the turbulent currents of her grief. Joanne's life took a significant turn when she married Emma's father at the age of 20. Richard, a seasoned art collector, was a decade her senior and had accumulated considerable wealth through savvy investments over the years. The arrival of Emma, born when Joanne was 23, added another layer of complexity to their marriage with Joanne feeling pressured into having children for Richard, despite her reservations and disinterest in motherhood. This lack of enthusiasm became apparent to Emma as a child, as she grappled with the emotional distance her mother put between them. Matt was away travelling again for work, a routine that Emma was adjusting to through their sporadic phone calls spanning across different time zones. Her morning had been slow, tidying up and arranging another bouquet Matt had sent her into a vintage vase she had found at a Paris flea market. With no concrete plans for the rest of the weekend, besides wanting to try out a new recipe she saw in the latest New York Times cooking newsletter, Emma decided to reach out to Paul and see if he wanted to do something. She was missing him and was feeling unsettled and confused by the distance that was growing between them. Emma's phone rang, and as she glanced at the screen to see her mother's name flashing, Emma felt it was a good time to take the call. With Matt being in town consistently for the past month, she had not been great at keeping in contact with her. Matt is a man of many facets, his passion for technology is matched only by his insatiable curiosity about the world. His frequent travels are not just a means of exploring new destinations but also an integral part of his professional life. While Emma admires his adventurous spirit, she finds herself at times perplexed by the enigmatic nature of his work. Emma's brows creased slightly in surprise. "Oh," she replied. Despite a connection developing, there were still many aspects of James's life that remained a mystery to her. She knew he worked in the tech industry with Paul and harbored a peculiar fascination with Elon Musk, but the specifics of his job had always eluded her. Although he mentioned a bit about it on their first date, she couldn't recall the exact details.In a dimly lit room, Emma sits hunched over her laptop, a half-empty glass of red wine beside her. Surrounded by scattered tissues and looking through photos of her boyfriend, James, her eyes are red and puffy from crying, her heart heavy with grief. The smell of 'feu du bois' from French candles fills the room, the one luxury James never begrudged her from buying. Emily catches sight of Milo, the ginger poodle, gifted to her by James two years prior. As she gazes into Milo's big, cartoon-like eyes, a flicker of hope lights up within her for a brief moment. Always a faithful companion and constant source of comfort, she needed Milo now more than ever. How will she find the strength to endure the days ahead, let alone the months and years to come? Emily's phone pings. Instinctively, she reaches for it, still half-expecting to see James's name followed by the love hearts and diamond ring emojis she had assigned to him. Instead, it's Paul, a long-time friend who introduced Emily and James five years ago. Since losing James just two weeks ago, Emily had been surrounded by an outpouring of love and support from friends. Her mother had also been supportive, but their relationship was complex, and Emily often found herself keeping her mother at arm's length when it came to emotional matters."How are you today? Have you managed to get some food into you?" Paul's message reads. Emily glances at her glass of wine and snaps a quick photo, replying, "No, but don't worry, I'm staying hydrated."Emily shuts her laptop, pulls the blanket that has draped her shoulders off the couch, and in a low monotone voice calls to Milo, "Come on, Milo,". oblivious to the loss he has also endured, Milo enthusiastically follows her to the bedroom. A room that once served as a sanctuary of love, intimacy, and comfort now feels cold, empty, and dark. A room that once held the conversations of their shared dreams now lay silent, the remnants of their aspirations reduced to mere fractions of dust. A room that she will remain in for the following days, riding the waves of her pain and navigating the turbulent currents of her grief. Joanne's life took a significant turn when she married Emma's father at the age of 20. Richard, a seasoned art collector, was a decade her senior and had accumulated considerable wealth through savvy investments over the years. The arrival of Emma, born when Joanne was 23, added another layer of complexity to their marriage with Joanne feeling pressured into having children for Richard, despite her reservations and disinterest in motherhood. This lack of enthusiasm became apparent to Emma as a child, as she grappled with the emotional distance her mother put between them. Matt was away travelling again for work, a routine that Emma was adjusting to through their sporadic phone calls spanning across different time zones. Her morning had been slow, tidying up and arranging another bouquet Matt had sent her into a vintage vase she had found at a Paris flea market. With no concrete plans for the rest of the weekend, besides wanting to try out a new recipe she saw in the latest New York Times cooking newsletter, Emma decided to reach out to Paul and see if he wanted to do something. She was missing him and was feeling unsettled and confused by the distance that was growing between them. Emma's phone rang, and as she glanced at the screen to see her mother's name flashing, Emma felt it was a good time to take the call. With Matt being in town consistently for the past month, she had not been great at keeping in contact with her. Matt is a man of many facets, his passion for technology is matched only by his insatiable curiosity about the world. His frequent travels are not just a means of exploring new destinations but also an integral part of his professional life. While Emma admires his adventurous spirit, she finds herself at times perplexed by the enigmatic nature of his work. Emma's brows creased slightly in surprise. "Oh," she replied. Despite a connection developing, there were still many aspects of James's life that remained a mystery to her. She knew he worked in the tech industry with Paul and harbored a peculiar fascination with Elon Musk, but the specifics of his job had always eluded her. Although he mentioned a bit about it on their first date, she couldn't recall the exact details.
In a narrative entwined with themes of love, loss, and betrayal, Poppy grapples with the shattered fragments of her reality while she navigates the uncharted territories of grief. As she confronts the complexities of human emotions she is left questioning the blurred lines between morality, connection and love.
noun
limerence
li·mer·ance
a state of being intensely infatuated with someone, often leading to delusions or a strong longing for a deep romantic connection with that person. Her limerence persisted even after his passing.
ADJECTIVE
Egregious
ih-gree-juhs
conspicuously and outrageously bad or offensive; standing out as exceptionally wrong or harmful. An egregious action or behavior is so heinous or shocking that it cannot be overlooked or excused easily.
A mistake of egregious proportions; an egregious liar.
ABOUT the author
Lani is a visionary creative based in Paris for the past decade. In 2020, she co-founded ORRIS, a brand born out of her passion for product design, French savoir-faire and visual storytelling. Growing up in Australia, Lani was deeply influenced by the country's profound connection to nature and botanicals, shaping her approach to crafting elevated skincare at ORRIS. This experience taught her the importance of thinking outside the box and bringing ideas from conception to fruition.
At the age of 21, she encountered a daunting challenge when panic attacks escalated into debilitating agoraphobia, prompting her to delve into the complexities of the mind. Her imagination was challenged, instead of sparking inspiration it was now negatively warping her reality. Through introspection and resilience, she reclaimed her cognitive power gaining profound insights into the limitless potential of imagination and learning to rewrite the narrative of fear.
Visualisation and escapism became indispensable tools for healing as Lani navigated life through a fractured mind, discovering a newfound sense of strength and purpose.
Using these experiences, she is delving into her passion for writing and storytelling to craft a novel that transports readers and ignites their imagination. The Mourning Chat invites readers on a journey to accompany the protagonist, Emma, as she navigates the uncharted territories of loss, betrayal and the intricate tapestry of human emotion, challenging our traditional ideas of connection and grief.
LANILEBERRE@GMAIL.COM